06 Jul I did nothing for a week.
I just spent the last week doing very little.
That is to say, hi, I’m Anna and I’m a hibernator.
I’ve become a doona-hogging sloth, started cuddling teapots, and eating a lot.
All this was new to me, at least in recent times. Previously, I’d do this a lot, albeit mindlessly, barely even noticing.
But this time I’m wary of slipping into old habits. So I still struggled through doing things, gave up, and then felt guilty about not doing what I’d intended.
But then, beyond the struggles, I gave in. I allowed myself full surrender. I gave in to nature, and took the space and rest I so needed.
There was struggle, there was resistance.
What am I learning after my recovery?
1. To soften. To play with nature’s rhythms and not against them. If I need more sleep, find a balanced way. If I rest more often at yoga, embrace it. I’m starting to softly allow myself things that previously hadn’t worked for me. To soften my body to the resistance within me.
2. To own my day and the choices I’ve made. If I can release the regret and not pressure myself to start and complete my work at 11pm, and just find the bed, it’s a triumph.
3. This also requires the return to what’s most important. Which for me is how I feel on the inside. And it’s also the big picture. I know there’ll always be deviations, detours and u-turns. And yet caring for me is how I can best support and honour everyone and everything else that’s important to me.
So what can you do to slow down and take true rest, to care for yourself from a place of needing to do what’s best by you, rather than a sneaky or guilty luxury? To know that this is what’s non negotiable, so that you can then use your full, recovered facilities for the people and projects that are closest to your heart.
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